Peace and Love Everyone!
Wishing you all the best for the New Year.
I wanted to take this post to look back on this year. 2018 was an interesting year for sure. I have grown to accept things I can and cannot change. That a person’s issues, although they affect me aren’t my issues. I learned to love myself more with each passing day. It’s also the year I became more organized using a journal.
2018 was the year I worked on not taking things personally. Some personal relationships took a bit of a hit. I was so hurt by how people who were close to me started to act. I was blamed for things I didn’t do. They were so convinced I did, I actual took a look at my actions. Finally, knowing I didn’t take the actions I was accused of I was hurt. How could they think I would do such a thing? Why blame people in your present for things just because it happened in the past? I know I’m being a bit vague. I wanted to tell you how I figured out that it’s not my issue. Anyway, it took me a while. Over a year. Then it dawned on me. This wasn’t my problem. Yes, many things that people do in life affect us. Many times the issue isn’t us or what we did, it’s the persons emotional baggage. If we really want the relationship to continue we have to let go of our role in it. The person, who ever they may be has to deal with whatever they think is happening, we cannot. The only thing we can do is tell our truth and leave the person to deal with their own issues. It’s so hard but it’s a realization that took the weight from me. I was no longer so hurt by the accusation. Before that I was so wrapped up it the accusation I didn’t see the hurt the person had gone through. I didn’t see the festering wound. It wasn’t about me, it was about their pain. You can’t heal anyone’s pain not matter how hard you try, they must figure out how to heal themselves and let go of the past. Letting go of the past doesn’t mean forgetting. It means learning from it so that we can move on. It’s so hard to let someone find their own way when you love them. Still, it’s the best thing for your health and sanity. If they let you, you can be their support while they heal.
On to a brighter note.
As you may know, I joined the bullet journal movement in 2018. Although, half way through the year it turned into a travelers notebook. It did help me get more organized. I saw myself growing and making more use of my time.
I realize that I started it to be more productive. Yet there were still times when I felt like I was stuck and not completing the tasks I set out to do. Other things were on target. I knew I needed to take time for me, but that had not been written in to any of my journal’s pages. So the time I took was time allocated for something else. It made it look like I was shirking off the things that I needed to get done. Still, me time was just as important.
Of course sometimes it’s important to push things to another day. That’s not my problem. I needed to prioritize my schedule. I needed to focus on what was most important to me. For the last 4 years I tried to build a business based on the things I love to do. Unfortunately, I couldn’t dedicate enough time to it because I also needed to work on my writing. Since I’m also working full time, and a mother, there wasn’t enough time in the day to dedicate to all of it. I did manage to continue my blog every week since August which had been an issue for me before.
One thing I’ve learned is that I must take time for me. I feel like as you get older you learn that it’s just as important to take care of yourself as your children and/or family. If you run yourself ragged eventually you won’t have anything to give. I think the next generation is learning this lesson a little earlier then mine did. At least it seems that way.
All in all I’ve grown and learned new things so we move into the new year with new hopes and dreams.
I go into the new year with some of the same goals as well as a few new ones. I will continue to organize my life. I will commit myself to the things I believe are important to me. And of course we will continue to Live Love and Create.
Next week, I’ll review the movies I saw this holiday.
Peace & Love!